Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
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