So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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