pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
