we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
