What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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