i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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