Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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