whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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