I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
