Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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