I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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