So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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