My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
