Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
