Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize