awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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