I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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