She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
