Don't make out with my wife yet
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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