girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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