We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i just made my gag reflex go away.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize