I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
