dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My feet surprised me
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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