We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
