I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
