East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
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