By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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