i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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