Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
