He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
