How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
please don't ironically join a cult
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