i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize