yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
