honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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