and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
