somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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