How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
