Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I think your dad took our porno
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize