been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize