I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
