I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
