those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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