It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
