Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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