We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
