you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Buhtt sex?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
