K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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