Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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