Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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