I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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